Now I'd watch horror movies every day if I could - I love the thrill of anticipation when you're awaiting a big scare. But before, I had major anxiety about being jumpscared. I hated that concept! I mean, who wants to be jumpscared (besides all you horror junkies out there, don't think I don't see you)? I certainly didn't, so I decided this: Every time a YouTuber I watched played a horror game, I would blatantly ignore it. Always. No exceptions.
That got boring pret-ty quick.The first horror playthrough I ever watched all the way through was the Hello Neighbor playlist, on the Kubz Scouts YouTube channel. It was me and my best friend Kamya on rabb.it nine times out of ten, and it was so much fun! I loved being scared, I loved the way the Neighbor came out from corners without any warning, it was all almost too much pleasant terror for my little heart!
I was lucky enough to get into Hello Neighbor early - the Pre-Alpha and Alpha 1 builds of the game were available for free officially, and I 100% planned on getting it! I wanted to play it for myself. I wanted to experience the thrill of horror games firsthand.
Yeah, no. That didn't exactly go well. I remember having this horrible anxiety while I was trying to play the game of being actually jumpscared in real life, as in having the neighbor stand behind me in my house and scare the bejeezus out of me. I was not a fan. So the early builds remained untouched for a long, long time. I wasn't (and still am not) a fan of actually playing the games. I liked watching from the sidelines.
So that's what I did. I watched jacksepticeye play Outlast 2, Markiplier, the self-proclaimed King of Five Nights at Freddy's, play his signature game. And that's when I finally decided to face my fears and play a game - when I watched him play Five Nights at Freddy's: Sister Location.
I'm weak for games with a great story, even if it's a horror game. Besides, Sister Location wasn't scary if you knew the strategies, if you could play the game. And I could do that! I was good at games (sort of)! What could go wrong?
Well, I could get stuck on Night 4 because of the stupid Minireenas, but that was a whole different issue. I didn't chicken out.I was terrified in the first night, even though to my relief, besides a few bangs in the vents that scared the life out of me, there were no jumpscares. The second night, I confidently kept out the Bidybabs even though my hands were shaking. On the third night, I did not have a fun time with Funtime Freddy. I really believed that all I had to do was survive Ballora (or was that the second night...?), but nooooo, Funtime Freddy just had to be a little - !
*ahem* Anyway, I really, really struggled with Funtime Foxy too. I couldn't really understand how to prevent a jumpscare. Not that I understand any better now, but at least I could make it through. Unlike with the Minireenas, which to this day, I have not made it past.
After I went to the group home, I watched my first horror movie, one I'd wanted to see for a long time: Lights Out. I really enjoyed it, up until the ending, which had me saying "Really? REALLY?" to everyone I told about the film. I remember being huddled up on the couch in the game room beside a friend of mine, all huddled up under a therapeutic blanket awaiting the jumpscares. I'd checked the movie out of the library because I wanted to face my stupid fears for once, and lo and behold, it wasn't even that hard. Maybe it was because we couldn't watch R-rated movies at the house, but I took what I could get.Since then, I've been watching horror movies as often as I can check them out of the library. So far, I've watched all three Insidious movies, The Ring, Rings (a surprisingly good sequel, by the way), Aliens (which I technically wasn't even supposed to have, but...), and Mama. I plan to watch the first two Halloween movies with my mom, a professional horror junkie. True, I'm not at her level of horror adoration, but I'm getting there. Horror movies are absolutely terrifying - and that's what makes them so fun and appealing to watch!
